Bricks
I can't believe I've let my blogging get so far from me.
It's been really hard to focus on what I should write or could write about that I kinda feel it would be a bit ingenuine of me to even try writing about such things.
After being laid off, it's been one big research paper about my life and discovering the the negatives that I've let come into my life.
Who knows what God has planned for me but I feel like the past few years have not exactly been my favorite years. I'm not sure why that is so. I do know that I've been thinking alot about the feelings I've had. The three being primarily sadness, jealousy and anger - anger probably ruling.
Maybe that's why I can't really grasp things, like I can't see purpose, or see happiness in my life and feel it - or see me.
I don't know. Sometimes we fail to realize that we've been building walls inside. And building them for different purposes. Some walls built to keep people out. Some walls to keep some things in. Some walls meant to hold on to the happy times - and not so happy times. Some walls to that aren't built for any reason but are remnants and trash left from years of resentment, dreams wasted, or words never said.
Sometimes the hardest bricks to break down are not the ones put up with purpose, but the ones that were put up by mistake and probaly the most damaging.
It's been really hard to focus on what I should write or could write about that I kinda feel it would be a bit ingenuine of me to even try writing about such things.
After being laid off, it's been one big research paper about my life and discovering the the negatives that I've let come into my life.
Who knows what God has planned for me but I feel like the past few years have not exactly been my favorite years. I'm not sure why that is so. I do know that I've been thinking alot about the feelings I've had. The three being primarily sadness, jealousy and anger - anger probably ruling.
Maybe that's why I can't really grasp things, like I can't see purpose, or see happiness in my life and feel it - or see me.
I don't know. Sometimes we fail to realize that we've been building walls inside. And building them for different purposes. Some walls built to keep people out. Some walls to keep some things in. Some walls meant to hold on to the happy times - and not so happy times. Some walls to that aren't built for any reason but are remnants and trash left from years of resentment, dreams wasted, or words never said.
Sometimes the hardest bricks to break down are not the ones put up with purpose, but the ones that were put up by mistake and probaly the most damaging.
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